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August 4th, 2005
12:02 pm
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Open letter
Dear Google,

I was attempting today to use your fine Google Maps service, and ran across an unexpected error.

You see, I was trying to do a quick and dirty calibration of my pedometer, so I figured I'd get the distance of a few blocks' walk home from the store. (I know it would be a necessarily inexact figure, but good enough for present purposes.) I requested directions down Fulweiler Avenue, as you can see here: [link].

To my consternation, I discovered that while its directions for walking in a straight line were uncannily accurate to late-night strolls I have had in the past, I am insufficiently drunk at the moment to replicate that walking pattern.

Accordingly, I would appreciate it if you would help rectify this unfortunate error of yours. I have just finished eating a quite tasty bagel with garlic and herb cream cheese, so a nice, light white wine would serve with distinction as a postprandial; however, some port or perhaps Guinness would also do in a pinch.

Please remit alcoholic beverage of choice (I am over 21; proof of age can be submitted as necessary) to:
(address omitted)

Many thanks.

T. 'Baxil' Ramspott, Esq.

Current Mood: amusedamused

(23 comments | Leave a comment)

Comments
 
[User Picture]
From:mithent
Date:August 4th, 2005 07:46 pm (UTC)
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*grins* In Google's defense, is the road one way?

Microsoft's service, of course, recommends that the best way between two Norwegian cities is by, er, 'driving' to the UK, then to France, through Belgium and so on.
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From:baxil
Date:August 4th, 2005 08:18 pm (UTC)
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Not one way, nope.
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From:necama
Date:August 4th, 2005 08:30 pm (UTC)
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Did you really need to say this twice?
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From:roaminrob
Date:August 4th, 2005 10:55 pm (UTC)
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You said it too two times. :-P
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From:baxil
Date:August 5th, 2005 02:04 am (UTC)
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You know, if you make this window big enough, turn your head sideways and squint, this page becomes a Magic Eye picture!
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From:elynne
Date:August 5th, 2005 09:44 pm (UTC)
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Redundancy is a virtue in information transmission and genetics!
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From:necama
Date:August 5th, 2005 09:57 pm (UTC)
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Is it just me, or is this getting a little silly?
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From:elynne
Date:August 5th, 2005 10:23 pm (UTC)
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Yes.
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From:necama
Date:August 8th, 2005 04:38 am (UTC)
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set silliness = true
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From:baxil
Date:August 8th, 2005 07:40 am (UTC)
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Forgot the semicolon.
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From:necama
Date:August 8th, 2005 07:20 pm (UTC)
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Last I checked, C, C++ and their derrivatives weren't the only programming languages in the world. Most languages nowadays don't require semicolons to work right.

Then again, most don't have a "set" directive, either. ;-)
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From:natetg
Date:August 4th, 2005 07:48 pm (UTC)

Artificial Stupidity?

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Does that segment of the street happen to be one-way?
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From:baxil
Date:August 4th, 2005 08:18 pm (UTC)

Re: Artificial Stupidity?

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Not one way, nope.
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From:necama
Date:August 4th, 2005 08:31 pm (UTC)

Re: Artificial Stupidity?

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Did you really need to say this twice?
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From:roaminrob
Date:August 4th, 2005 10:55 pm (UTC)

Re: Artificial Stupidity?

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You said it too two times. :-P
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From:baxil
Date:August 5th, 2005 02:02 am (UTC)

With a nod to Red Dwarf

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There's just two answers to that question:
It was asked twice; and
It was asked twice.

I know that really that's only a single answer, but it's so important I thought I'd mention it twice.
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From:elynne
Date:August 5th, 2005 09:44 pm (UTC)

Re: With a nod to Red Dwarf

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Redundancy is a virtue in information transmission and genetics!
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From:necama
Date:August 5th, 2005 09:57 pm (UTC)

Re: With a nod to Red Dwarf

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Is it just me, or is this getting a little silly?
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From:elynne
Date:August 5th, 2005 10:23 pm (UTC)

Re: With a nod to Red Dwarf

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No.
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From:necama
Date:August 8th, 2005 04:38 am (UTC)

Re: With a nod to Red Dwarf

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set silliness = false

compiler error: variable silliness already set. Please reinsert universe and restart.
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From:darkkdragon
Date:August 4th, 2005 08:54 pm (UTC)
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Round and round she goes... where she stops... not even Google knows...
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From:taral
Date:August 4th, 2005 11:28 pm (UTC)
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Heh, broken search algorithm. Looks like it prefers yellow roads too much.
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From:wy
Date:August 5th, 2005 02:45 am (UTC)
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Intresting. If you reverse the route, it *IS* in a straight line.

Perhaps it's assuming you're in one corner or another of the intersection.
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