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November 12th, 2008
10:15 pm
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Ninja texting
Even though I've basically canceled my social life for November while writing The Story, I refuse to give up Saturdays. Saturday afternoons is when my gaming buddies and I get together for some high-quality hack-and-slash, pulling out character sheets and dice bags* and miniatures and bags of cheap, fattening snacks and going on eight-hour Dungeons & Dragons marathons.

Last Saturday was especially therapeutic, because it was the first time in three weeks that we'd gotten to sit down and sling dice. It was also the first time in months that we played our original Lindonian campaign -- the one that inspired the tales of CSI: Luvine. The one without a single character of good alignment (although my character is attempting to develop a conscience on his way toward druidry). Needless to say, there was much gleeful slaughter.

But while we were capturing siege weapons and making elf-kebabs**, something even more awesome happened.

I got a text message.
No way! it was you that did it (:
It was pretty clearly from a wrong number. I read it out to the guys and asked if any of them knew the sender. Nope: just a completely random, out of the blue, mobile misfire. So I whipped out my phone and sent back:

It was the ninja. They're sneaky that way.

While the other players were laughing, Mike asked for the other party's phone number (which I supplied.) I quickly got back a profusely apologetic response explaining that I wasn't meant to be the recipient. And Mike fired off a text, from his own number:

I heard the ninjas are on the attack again.

Of course, we giggled over this, in the manner of postadolescent boys reliving their teenage days. But the real win came when he got a response:
Yep! fortunately, I managed to fight them off with my machete.
--
* Or, in my case, dice box. I actually have an old fishing box I've converted over to hold dice and miniatures. Which says more about me than I'd probably like.
** No shit, there I was: Just after combat had begun with a group of dark elf cavalry that charged our positions, I had to go to the bathroom. Having uncharacteristically won the very first spot in the initiative order, my mage completely failed to hit anything with his looted elvish autocrossbow. So I said "On the off chance that I'm still in the bathroom when my next turn comes around, I'm going to be firing again at the nearest enemy, and I'm going to preroll my attack." The die tumbled down a 20 and I confirmed the crit. Five minutes later, after having heard much whooping, laughter and loud conversation from my seat on the porcelain throne, I returned to discover that Cole's character had quadruple-critted his attack with a repeating ballista, and skewered the entire raiding party except for the leader in two clean shots. The remaining elf had surrendered and begged for mercy, at which point my mage's declared action came around -- and my crit ran through the head of the remaining elf, killing him instantly.

Current Location: ~/Brainstorm
Current Mood: goodgood
Current Music: Final Fantasy Tactics OST, "Requiem"
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(9 comments | Leave a comment)

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From:packbat
Date:November 13th, 2008 03:08 pm (UTC)
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Machete? Hmm! You know, this makes me think: is there a clean divide between pirate and ninja weapons?

I mean, machete is definitely pirate, as are baseball bat and shotgun, and sniper rifle is ninja, as are garrote and memetic virus, but where would the scythe be?
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From:natetg
Date:November 13th, 2008 05:27 pm (UTC)

Probably Not

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Both Pirates and Ninjas are known to throw knives and use daggers.
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From:baxil
Date:November 15th, 2008 02:23 am (UTC)

Re: Probably Not

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At least we know that if we can ever master the dark arts of alchemy and unleash the dreaded NINJAPIRATE upon the world, he'll have something to wield.
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From:packbat
Date:November 15th, 2008 02:30 am (UTC)

Re: Probably Not

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Aye, this is true.
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From:baxil
Date:November 15th, 2008 02:21 am (UTC)
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Scythe is definitely ninja. And I mean that historically: the roots of the ninja were among peasants, who used many of their weapons for the exact reason that banning them would send any lord's lands into mass riot and starvation as farmers found themselves unable to work.
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From:packbat
Date:November 15th, 2008 02:31 am (UTC)
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Good enough for me!
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From:keithsdragons
Date:November 13th, 2008 08:27 pm (UTC)
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They were a raiding party, y'know. You did the "right" thing. ;)

I go to a Christian college, so we inevitably end up with a few too many Lawful Righteous FagsShouldGoToHell Good players. My chaotic neutral sorcerer keeps it interesting.

Pants of +2 Charisma and a pocket dragon... *grins*
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From:baxil
Date:November 15th, 2008 02:19 am (UTC)
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Chaotic neutral keeps things interesting, but in my experience does tend to become fairly predictable in their unreliability. You really want to mess with their heads ... play Chaotic Good to a T, and find actual moral justification for going the exact opposite way their characters want to go, and sit there and argue it out with them on the grounds that you've got to promote the greater good.

Our little spat with the raiding party was purely one of self-interest; namely, we agreed to help them to get out of a jam, with both sides knowing that the other was going to double-cross them as soon as possible. Luckily for them, they double-crossed us first. Unluckily for them, they did it incompetently.

Also: Nice to meet you. :)
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From:keithsdragons
Date:November 15th, 2008 05:32 am (UTC)
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Brilliant!

It's been fun listening, and I thought I should chime in at some point, though in between final exams and burning through physics textbooks at full tilt is probably a poor time for making good impressions. I'm "mentally numb", as they say.

*rocks out*
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