Baxil [bakh-HEEL'], n. - Typed up to the sound of hail outside
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Typed up to the sound of hail outside|
Dear Month of June,
I wish I had happier occasion to write — you have long been a dear friend; hosting graduations and hikes and warm lazy days — but your outrageous behavior has forced our hands.
With regret, we must revoke your membership in the League of Summer Months, effective immediately.
The Northern California Chapter of LoSM takes its responsibilities seriously. Our bylaws are quite clear: golden-brown hills; cloudless skies; dwindling rivers; aggressive temperatures. We know that no month can adhere to those standards perfectly, and we do make allowance for the occasional thunderstorm or cold front; but nevertheless those are the ideals to which we strive.
Your first hailstorm resulted in a warning. Perhaps you thought we were joking, because the following year you tested our limits once again. It is only the desperate pleas of August which prevented your immediate dismissal, and you were warned that you would be strictly monitored for any further misbehavior.
Sadly, a third successive year of hail is too much for our patience. Please mail in your membership card. Your dues will not be refunded.
It is our fond hope that you seek a position in the Spring Coalition, which might be more tolerant of your lifestyle choices. (I understand that May has even been written a warning for her recent violation of the Snow Code.) We plan to extend a membership offer to September in the near future.
League of Summer Months membership coordinator
Northern California Chapter
Current Location: ~brainstorm
Current Music: Kevin Harris, "Restless Night"
Tags: my brain now hurts
This is why I love you Bax! I was told in Alaska that we brought the California weather up with us, I think I may have brought the Alaskan weather home with me. :P
You should be happy we sent cool weather, rain, hail, snow. It may be late but from what I understand, California is in the throes of a terrible drought that has lasted years. You need the moisture even if it does delay summer and make your skin wrinkly and moldy.
What happens if it shapes up next year?
|Date:||June 7th, 2012 11:44 pm (UTC)|| |
August is making a lot of noise about June's departure, so ... maybe we could work something out, to keep the peace. Definitely contingent on good behavior, though.
Bax, I can't honestly express how much this made me smile.
|Date:||June 20th, 2012 03:37 am (UTC)|| |
Welcome to the end of the world.