Baxil [bakh-HEEL'], n.
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Below are the 4 most recent journal entries recorded in the "Baxil" journal:
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02:13 am
![[User Picture]](http://p-userpic.livejournal.com/59215336/240226) [Link] | "... If you're a transvestite, you get lumped into that weirdo grouping, you know? When I was in New York, there was a guy in the Bronx who was living in a cave … like you do, and he was coming out and shooting at geese and… (chuckles) a lot of weird things going on with this guy; and the police picked him up and they found a collection of women's shoes, and they thought, "Maybe he's a transvestite.” And if he is, he's a fucking weirdo transvestite! I'm much more in the executive transvestite area. Travel the world, yes, it's much more executive."
- Eddie Izzard
I have always tried to personally avoid the "executive $groupname" versus "weirdo $groupname" distinction. It's a real phenomenon, yes, but also a very subjective one. And with the fringes I hang out in, it's useful not to lose the perspective: Any given "executive" member of a subculture is still a weirdo to most people.
Be that as it may, I've been feeling a lot like an executive lately.
I identify as a dragon and still maintain the widely used FAQ for people of like mind. I study magic and talk to spirits. I packed up my life and walked nearly 1000 miles of trail last summer. I'm polyamorous and have been bisexual (and still am both in theory, though in practice my commitment to ![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) kadyg comes first).
Yet despite my strange and convention-defying life, the main reaction so far to my tattoo seems to be surprise.
Apparently I come off as an executive freak -- to the point that people who thought they knew me are doing double-takes. I'm just not the sort of person who they would expect to do something as bizarre as ... you know. Label myself.
"Is that henna?" has been popular, though "Oh, that's permanent?" is another strong contender. My boss at the store was the most blunt in her admiration: "You're about the last person I'd have ever guessed would get a tattoo."
Hopefully those of you who read this journal have had a little more warning. I've mentioned it several times as being among my list of ten-year goals. On Saturday, it all fell together; the bookshop downstairs had brought in a ritual tattoo artist, and so underneath a blood moon, I had a sigil inked into my arm.
The tattoo, which you can see closer in my new user icon as well as by clicking on the picture above, is a stylized flame of my own design. I'll explain its significance in a subsequent post -- I just wanted to show it off as I check another goal off the list.
Current Location: ~/computer_desk
Current Mood:  inx0red
Current Music: Tom Petty, "Last Dance With Mary Jane"
Tags: goals, misc life updates, tattoo
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07:23 pm
![[User Picture]](http://p-userpic.livejournal.com/49037546/240226) [Link] |
I'm dreaming of a white ... something
It's snowing like crazy outside the office -- about six inches in six hours, which is huge for the foothills -- and roaminrob is advising me not to drive home. While I'm waiting for him and kadyg to pick me up, a few happy updates.
First of all, my intestinal condition ... isn't getting worse. It appears to have stabilized at "loose stools and minor discomfort," which is about what it was when it took the downturn two days ago, but still much better than before the meds. So I'm trying to take it easy while the clock ticks down to the gastro specialist's appointment on Monday. I appreciate everyone's suggestions in the last post; if the doc doesn't bring them up as possibilities, I will.
Secondly, my financial situation just took a wild and sudden swing. A former roommate who has been gradually paying off an old debt I financed for him decided to clear the books and is sending me a check for $4500. I'll probably be putting this mostly toward its intended use -- nuking credit-card debt -- but this does give me a cushion with which to cover the deductible I'd been freaking out about.
On top of that, I've been furiously working on our taxes for the last few days. I was expecting our return to come out as a wash -- Kady and I both earned a lot less last year than usual, but I also got paid a good chunk of money without any withholdings. Turns out that, due to credits and exemptions and self-employment health insurance deductions, we're getting a $550 refund. ]B=8D That money will go to settle bills, eat out somewhere nice once my stomach recovers, and maybe even fund the tattoo on my ten-year goals list.
Many thanks to everyone who sent me public or private offers of financial assistance. I took a wait-and-let's-see approach with them; this isn't exactly what I was waiting for, but I'll *gladly* take it. I'm heartened that people were so willing to chip in -- because I do know several wonderful people (mostly artists) who have hit similar tight patches and don't have freak strokes of luck like this to fall back on. I would much rather see the money people were willing to contribute go to one of them, the next time a crisis strikes. And if anyone has already put something in the mail for me, when I receive it, I'll set it aside -- if I can get through this without anything going dramatically wrong, I'll re-gift it to someone else deserving.
Also, tomorrow is kadyg's birthday. Yay!
Current Location: ~yuba
Current Mood: relieved
Current Music: Vagrant Story OST, "Staff Roll"
Tags: american health care is a piece of shit, goals
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12:34 am
![[User Picture]](http://p-userpic.livejournal.com/41140258/240226) [Link] |
BaxWalk: Where did this start?
As previously mentioned *, I am going to walk the Pacific Crest Trail this summer. It's a 2,650-mile trek -- some would say a 2,650-mile slog -- and not the sort of thing anyone would do on a whim.
After all, it involves several thousand dollars' worth of expenses and quitting my job; a physical commitment of several months of protracted physical exertion; and a social commitment of several months of isolation from virtually everyone I know. Given all that, what drove me to the idea? What will keep me going when the trail gets harsh?
( On my ten-year goals )
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* And last month wasn't even my first mention! Extremely observant readers may recall that, in fact, I broke my silence on this in November 2004. Not that anyone noticed at the time, thankfully.
** Given the turns my life has been taking -- such as marriage -- #6 is going to end up being stricken from the list. It's the only casualty so far. If I'm feeling ambitious I may find something similar (but less dangerous and isolating) to replace it, but I'd be happy turning in a 5-star performance.
Current Mood:  reflective
Current Music: Indigo Girls, "Closer to Fine"
Tags: baxwalk pct, goals, hiking
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12:07 am
![[User Picture]](http://p-userpic.livejournal.com/3864503/240226) [Link] |
A winner is me!
Well, that's one of my ten-year goals down, four to go! Next up: Hike the Pacific Crest Trail (ETA summer 2006), or perhaps get that tattoo (ETA undecided).
I'm going to sit back down and finish the novel now -- I validated it after I hit the 50K mark, but there's still a scene or two to wrap up tonight before it's totally done. Will finish uploading it after the final word is written.
And, for the benefit of those who have been patiently waiting all November for me to stop being all riddley with my story link, can someone in the audience point all interested parties at where I've posted the month's work? ]B=8)
I'll post a request for feedback on the novel a little later -- there are a few things I'm specifically wondering -- but in the meantime, you can also consider this an open thread for comments on "Notes from the End of the World."
Edit 7:30 a.m. Nov. 30:
Final word count: 54,586
Dec. 2:
Final rank: #767 out of 5,890 winners and 42,301 participants
Current Mood:  accomplished
Current Music: Queen, "The Miracle"
Tags: goals, hiking, ttu, writing
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