Baxil (baxil) wrote,

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"Hey, how come this rain is sweet and sour?"

In honor of today's release of Harry Potter and the Half-blood Prince ...:

Have you already picked up your copy, read through it, and are starving for more Harry? Fear not! We've got some new Potter to tide you over until Book 7 -- Harry Potter and Leopard Walk Up to Dragon, a book with a tale so incredibly special that it could only be released in China. [cover image]

I don't want to give away any spoilers, but let's just say that we've always known that Harry was a creature of "hobbit."

A partial translation can be found here, starting with the immortal lines:
Harry did not know how long this bath would take, when he would finally scrub off that oily, sticky layer of cake icing. For someone who had grown into a cultured, polite young man, a layer of sticky filth really made him feel sick. He lay in the high quality porcelain tub ceaselessly wiping his face. In his thoughts there was nothing but Dudley's fat face, fat as his Aunt Petunia's fat rear end.

Don't be scared. I know it sounds like the start of a bad piece of slash, but Aunt Petunia's ass is never mentioned again.

And just remember the moral of the story: Never joke about nose hair with your friends.
"Oh, it's no use" Hermione said, closing the book with a bang. Who wants their nose hair to grow curls?"

"Hahaha, anyway I don't disagree." Suddenly, from outside the window came a strange, eccentric voice: "Harry, your nightmare is starting."

More information about the book at Wikipedia: Harry Potter and Leopard-Walk-Up-to-Dragon. (Cover image also courtesy Wikipedia.)
Tags: my brain now hurts, wordplay

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