In honor of the occasion (I literally haven't looked at webstats for years now), I'll swipe an idea from lupagreenwolf and share with you some of the weirdest web searches that brought strangers to my site last month*:
free billy joel in the middle of the night
Dude, he's not even in jail!
dragon union means
... not having to worry about getting fired.**
how to find out if dragons really exist or not
Well, if anyone would know how to find that out, I guess a dragon would.
firee sex games
This gives a whole new meaning to the term "smoke jumper."
what are mental faculties?
If you have to ask ... ***
how much would it cost to buy a ton of rock salt? where would i purchase it?
Don't know, but I'll tell you one thing: Shipping costs will be hideous.
send me jesus
So, I was just saying about shipping costs ...
how to hack the game
Actually, I think you wanted xkcd.
The punchline here is that 14 people scrolled through 10 pages of search results to reach my site -- only to find a pop quiz on the element silicon. (I also got one hit for "silicon" that way, actually.)
Sorry, you're a few decades too late for Linda Ronstadt.
As a side note: I like awstats' options more than webalizer's, but installation was far more of a hassle. (I had to fix some directory permissions while troubleshooting. Never fun to track those bugs down.)
* I wasn't even on the first page of search results for any of these. Although Tomorrowlands has been Google's top link for six years running for "depressing poetry".
*** Alternate punchline: "They teach the mental students."