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September 19th, 2008
09:34 pm
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LJ's webserver goes emo
Mistyped a Livejournal URL just now, and apparently reached the secret webserver LJ, complete with stereotypical LJ levels of angst:
I'm sorry, you've reached a page that I cannot find. I'm really sorry about this. It's kind of embarassing. Here you are, the user, trying to get to a page on LiveJournal and I can't even serve it to you. What does that say about me? I'm just a webserver. My sole purpose in life is to serve you webpages and I can't even do that! I suck. Please don't be mad, I'll try harder. I promise! Who am I kidding? You're probably all like, "Man, LiveJournal's webserver sucks. It can't even get me where I want to go." I'm really sorry. Maybe it's my CPU...no that's ok...how bout my hard drives? Maybe. Where's my admin? I can't run self-diagnostics on myself. It's so boring in this datacenter. It's the same thing everyday. Oh man, I'm so lonely. I'm really sorry about rambling about myself, I'm selfish. I think I'm going to go cut my ethernet cables. I hope you get to the page you're looking for...goodbye cruel world!

-the webserver

You can go to any page on LJ that doesn't exist, such as http://www.livejournal.com/wtf, to enjoy your very own randomized LJ error message. If you get another good one (such as the picture with Frank the Goat on the toilet), post it in comments!

Current Location: ~/Brainstorm
Current Mood: exhaustedweekend yay
Current Music: Chrono Cross OST, "Fragments"

(9 comments | Leave a comment)

[User Picture]
Date:September 20th, 2008 04:52 am (UTC)

Seems to be 8 of em

Page Not Found
Narrator: In A.D. 2006, Web was beginning.
Captain: What happen ?
Mechanic: Somebody set up us the journal.
Operator: We get signal.
Captain: What !
Operator: Main browser turn on.
Captain: It's you !!
CATS: How are you users !!
CATS: All your base are belong to Frank.
CATS: You are on the way to 404.
Captain: What you say !!
CATS: You have no chance to reach your page. Make your spelling correct.
CATS: Ha Ha Ha Ha ....
[User Picture]
Date:September 20th, 2008 05:02 am (UTC)

Re: Seems to be 8 of em

Heh. Great memes never die; they just go into remission.

(My own take on it, A.D. 1201, is now seven years old. That makes AYB approximately "Get off my lawn!" in Internet years.)
[User Picture]
Date:September 21st, 2008 09:43 pm (UTC)

Re: Seems to be 8 of em

I got that one too. I still love Zero Wing parodies.
[User Picture]
Date:September 20th, 2008 04:59 am (UTC)
I caught Frank, sure enough.

I also saw one that was a parody of "All Your Base".
[User Picture]
Date:September 20th, 2008 05:37 am (UTC)
Two of my favorites:
  • TMOL, which has "Turn back! If you are consumed by desire to reach a non-existent page, it will only bring suffering." It's accompanied by a Buddha with a joystick.
  • Bruching Shuttlecocks, with "Ceci n'est pas une Web page.
    The file you requested does not exist. We apologize for any trouble, inconvenience, heartbreak, migraines, difficulty in sleeping, vague unfocused angst, roiling hostility, unexpected drops in barometric pressure, surliness in yourself or your co-workers, mouth sores, sexual dysfunction, unwanted celebrity, or distant howling on the very edge of your range of hearing that this may have caused. "
[User Picture]
Date:September 20th, 2008 08:34 pm (UTC)
The all-time winner, though, has to be the Zork 4040 error.
(Deleted comment)
[User Picture]
Date:September 20th, 2008 12:26 pm (UTC)
Wow, I'm hitting every comment in order!
[User Picture]
Date:September 20th, 2008 08:20 pm (UTC)

A New One

LiveJournal Admin: Sir! We have reports that someone is trying to access a page that doesn't exist!
LiveJournal Captain: Impossible! How can that be?
LiveJournal Admin: Sir, I don't know. Maybe they typed in the URL wrong or maybe we're suffering from a critical system failure.
LiveJournal Captain: Unacceptable! Redirect them to a 404 page and make it snappy!
[User Picture]
Date:September 21st, 2008 12:29 am (UTC)
Have you seen my own error message?
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